I seem to somehow have lost my ability to deal with things… with life. The slightest upset, worry or stress leaves me feeling nervous and anxious. I’ve also noticed I’m jumpy. I get butterflies in my stomach at the slightest thing and generally feel on edge whenever I’m out.
The truth is I feel like I’m not in control. Not in control of my work. Not in control of my body and emotions. Funnily enough all of my life I have worked so hard to keep these in check. And now at this key moment, I’m failing to keep calm and composed. I feel like I’m broken now. Not working properly. Struggling to get through each hour and day. Waiting for that magic switch or moment that will make everything ok. Make everything return to normal. Like it used to be.
I’m not really sure how to deal with this, so I’m just focussing on one day at a time. But none the less struggling. Therefore to help and to believe again, I fold my hands and pray. Pray to God. To shower me with peace, to shower me with happiness and to fill my life with love. To get rid of the dull ache and fill it with the breeze of positivity.
I also ask each and every one of you, every part of this universe to shower me with your good thoughts. Your blessings and more importantly your friendship and love to help get me through.
©️BijM01, July 2018
Normal is not real 