I've had a bad day today. One where I really haven't felt good. I've been grumpy, on edge and continuously anxious. I hate when I feel like this cos I find it so hard to pick myself up again. To be positive. To not let the setback or drag me down and hold me back. … Continue reading Bad day
Author: BijM01
Would you?
If I told you that it wasn't meant to be this way, would you believe me? If I told you that all this wasn't real, it's simply just a figment of your imagination, would you still give me the time of day? If I told you, that even in the darkness, light will always be … Continue reading Would you?
Running Away
One thing I have learnt over the past few weeks, is that I am the queen of running away. Looking back at my life, even when I was only 12 years old, I recall that I ran away when situations were too difficult to deal with. At that age however, I don't think that I … Continue reading Running Away
Frustrated
Eugh! I feel really frustrated. I want more out of life. I want to do more. I want to be the best that I can be. I want a new job, but I don't know what to go in to. I want to do something meaningful. Something with purpose that helps other people. I want … Continue reading Frustrated
Me and my Persona
Ever since I was a little girl, I've put up this front with people. One of resilience, strength and a 'don't mess with me' attitude. I also pride myself in always keeping cool, calm and collective. Never giving the game away and never allowing all but a handful of people to know the real me. … Continue reading Me and my Persona
Nobody understands
Nobody seems to understand what I am going through. I feel so alone in this big wide world. Part of me doesn't want to share my feelings to those close to me, cos I don't want them to worry about me. The other part is just dying for an opportune moment to pour my heart … Continue reading Nobody understands
I love Friday night
I absolutely love Friday night. Once I've finished work and am sitting on the sofa at home. It's the only time in the week that I feel totally relaxed, free of worry and completely at ease. My mind has stopped running. There are no thoughts racing through my head. Work on Monday seems ages away. … Continue reading I love Friday night
Moving On
A feeling of sadness. A feeling of fear. But not an angry or resentful sadness, more one of acceptance. Tears are slowly rolling down my cheeks, but I feel like they are releasing my pain. They are somehow putting me at ease, filling me with peace. Making room for a dose of happiness. I'll accept … Continue reading Moving On
I Caused It
I close my eyes and take a deep breath in. I slowly exhale, almost waiting for the weight on my shoulders to ease. To drop. I've been feeling so tense lately. My shoulders are stiff and sensitive. The slightest touch of my shoulder blades leaves me wincing in pain. And the worst thing about all … Continue reading I Caused It
Always the case in the workplace
It's always the case. Even though I have more experience and knowledge about a certain area or field in my workplace, my words, thoughts and opinions are given second place. It's so annoying, especially when the other people who are given more value than me haven't actually worked on what is being discussed. Why is … Continue reading Always the case in the workplace
There is
There is calm in this storm. There is light in this darkness. There is rays of light beaming through these thick clouds. Fighting it's way through and dazzling me with its brilliant shine. The light is pouring onto me, soaking me through. Leaving me feeling light, free, happy and peaceful. There is peace (shanti) in … Continue reading There is
Love
I've always struggled with love. Especially telling the people I love that I love them. My throat dries up and I choke, trying my best to hold back the tears that are that are waiting to burst out. Fighting to keep them in. I'm not really sure why I struggle so much with affection. It … Continue reading Love
Reminiscing
There are some things in life, that reminiscing about brings a smile to your lips. It could be a photograph of a loved one, a place you've visited before, a song, or even eating a specific food dish. For me this evening it's been listening to old school songs. Reminiscing about what the songs represented … Continue reading Reminiscing
Being A Good Person
I try my best to be a good person. I try my best to not let people get to me, or get upset or wish someone bad luck when they harm me. But it's really difficult to not have bad thought go through your mind at times. This world can be difficult. People can be … Continue reading Being A Good Person
Forgiveness
Forgiveness is the key to my happiness. Forgiveness is the key to my self acceptance. Forgiveness is the first step in my healing process. Forgiving others is easy; as long as I put my pride and ego aside. However, forgiving myself is the most difficult part, because it means admitting that there is something wrong. … Continue reading Forgiveness
I can
I can do anything I put my mind to. I can be anything I desire to be. And I can achieve everything possible. So next time you're with me, don't tell me I can't do something. In fact don't tell me what I can and can't do full stop. I am better than you think … Continue reading I can
Hands that serve are holier than lips that pray
"Hands that serve are holier than lips that pray." Baba A well known proverb that can actually be put into action and is easy to understand. What have you done today to help another? What have you done to help someone who is need, someone who is hungry, someone who is thirsty or someone who … Continue reading Hands that serve are holier than lips that pray
Dealing with things
I seem to somehow have lost my ability to deal with things... with life. The slightest upset, worry or stress leaves me feeling nervous and anxious. I've also noticed I'm jumpy. I get butterflies in my stomach at the slightest thing and generally feel on edge whenever I'm out. The truth is I feel like … Continue reading Dealing with things
Change
I've made the decision to let go. To embrace life and be free. Free from all the shackles in my life that are tying me down. To do something I truly love and leave this rat race of chasing money. For the first time thinking about it doesn't make me feel scared. I feel slightly … Continue reading Change
This Person
There's something about this person, I don't know what, that makes me feel awful everytime I see them. I avoid them whenever possible and can honestly say that I genuinely dislike them. When I think of this person, I can't help but swear at them in my mind. This person is making me a bad … Continue reading This Person
Normal is not real 