Tell me, can you feel the kisses I've left for you? The ones just above that spot on your cheek where your beauty spot is? These are kisses of hope. Of anticipation. Of faith. Of passion. But most of all of love and belief. Belief that what we have is real. That it's something special. … Continue reading Kisses
When I close my eyes, I can feel your presence. When I run the tips of my fingers through my hair, I feel you watching me. When I smile I feel like you are smiling with me. When I laugh out loud, I feel like you are falling for me a little bit more. When … Continue reading You are there
Self confidence. What is this I hear you ask? And does it really matter? The answer is yes, it matters. It is one of the most important traits a person can have. Faith in yourself. Trust in yourself. As a person and in your abilities. Your thoughts, your emotions. Feeling strong enough to be by … Continue reading Self Confidence
What I really want is for my mum to hold me, whilst I cry in her arms. It's coming back, it has been for a while. I know something is not right. I've been feeling irritable, angry and annoyed... something's not quite right. But I can't possibly put my family, my parents through anymore grief … Continue reading What I want
I'm not feeling great today. After so long. After so much progress. Today I've met with a big bump in the road. And all it's done is frustrate me and made me think of all the things I can't do. It's made me feel inferior and subordinate. It's made me feel frustrated with myself and … Continue reading Not feeling great
So today I am 35 years young. As I look ahead to my 35th year on this earth, I make a wish for love, contentment, compassion and the ability to serve those in need. As I look back on my 34th year, a feeling of resilience overcomes me. I can honestly hand on my heart … Continue reading 35 years young
What's meant to be will be. No matter what happens, if you are meant to be mine, and me yours, then that's exactly what will happen. Nothing, or no one can change that or take us away from each other, if we really are written in each other's destiny. And just so you, and this … Continue reading What’s meant to be will be
A little prayer, a little wish. One to mark the start of a new beginning, The next chapter, a new leaf. One that I'm finally ready for. One of love, hope and togetherness. A hope and faith that makes me feel whole, that makes me feel complete. One where I feel good enough, and that … Continue reading A Little Prayer
Hello. I'm here. I'm waiting for you. And I'm more than ready to finally meet you and spend the rest of my life with you. Loving you, respecting you, supporting you and watching you grow. Completing you, making you a better version of yourself and allowing you to be anything you want to be. Tell … Continue reading I’m here
I believe that in this big wide world, you are out there. I believe that you have been made just for me, and one day we will meet and know that we were written in each other's destiny's. I was made for you and you were made for me. And together we will make each … Continue reading I Believe
Pick me up from this dark place, filled with a million different thoughts, almost in a race. My mind is running all around, this is tiring, and leaving me with no place for anything profound. This state is making me feel empty and unreal, almost like a quitter. When I'm like this I'm really not … Continue reading Pick me up
I don't know what to do. For the first time in my life, I feel like I'm wondering around aimlessly. I don't know what I want. I don't know what I'm trying to achieve and I don't have any goals. When I need to make a decision about something important, I honestly don't know what … Continue reading Don’t know
Hello, I hear you say. I'm back again. And this time I'm going to push your boundaries. I'm going to test your faith, belief, strength and resilience. I'm going to try my hardest to break you. My anxiety is back. In full force. I could feel it coming back, but was trying to carry on … Continue reading Hello
I'm scared of people... I'm scared of you. And today I realised why. Why am I avoiding eye contact when speaking to people? Why do I constantly look away and act like I'm in the middle of something? Obviously, I'm hiding something. I'm hiding my true emotions and state from the world. I don't want … Continue reading Avoiding you
Is this what life has come to? We are all so busy. Busy in our lives and own world. Head down, looking at our phones, tablets and the TV. When did we stop to talk to the person sitting next to us? When was the last time you spoke to family/friends and gave them your … Continue reading Too Busy
So today I did something different. I've always had this thing about being a certain way at work, keeping a certain image, especially as a manager. One of confidence, one of resilience and one where I don't show anyone my weaknesses. But today I went in and told my manager that I'm not ok, I'm … Continue reading Today
I'm scared. I'm scared of being around people, I'm scared of meeting people and I'm scared of talking to people. I don't give people my full attention when talking to them, I don't give them that eye contact. What exactly is it I'm afraid of? Being judged? Saying something stupid? Doing something silly....? Am I … Continue reading Scared
That feeling of being constantly on edge. Wanting to run away. Being easily irritated and wanting to be alone, so that I can hide until this feeling passes. But at the same time, hating that I'm on edge. Hating that I'm irritable and so self involved. Wanting to be around people and feel at ease. … Continue reading That Feeling
Do you ever feel like you just want to switch off from life? To take a break and press the pause button? Just for a moment. No worries. No thoughts. Just incredibly deep, contented peace. Just thinking of it fills me with ease and I breathe a sigh of relief. I don't want the world … Continue reading Switch Off
Strong. Determined. Focused. Reliable. These were all words I would use to describe myself. Unfortunately anxiety has wiped away the very essence of my being. These are words I no longer associate with myself. My identity has changed. ©️BijM01, March 2019
Normal is not real 